My Ode to Graduate School

The end of graduate school that is! It's hard to believe that I am merely 48 hours away from being completely finished with graduate school.

I was never that kid that thought about college when I as little. No, I was too busy thinking about riding bikes, playing in the dirt and socializing with my friends. (Actually, I still think about all those things, hee hee). Even in high school I was more concerned with my social life and sports rather than academia. But once I got really rolling and found my niche in college, graduate school became a goal that I thought about often.

My senior year of college I thought a lot about graduate school. I thought a lot about graduate school in Florida. I also thought a lot about graduate school so that I would not have to enter the 'real' world. The night before I graduated from undergrad, the Dean of Student Services said I could come back to graduate school there (at Cal) and he would help me get a graduate assistant position. Score!! Now that's a FREE party! Yet, I didn't end up in graduate school in Florida (then) and I didn't take advantage of the party extension. Nothing felt right. So, into the working world I went. I'm too embarrassed to admit what my first 'professional' job paid me right out of college. All I can say is Thank God I had parents that let me live at home and didn't charge me rent!

I applied to graduate school a year later. I applied to a school in Virgina where one of my best friends was attending graduate school. I was weight-listed and eventually did not make the cut. I was bummed. I was lost.

A few years later I was growing restless and ready to consider graduate school again. I explored a few options in Pittsburgh, but again, nothing felt right.

I moved to Florida and lived here for 2 years before I got the itch for school again. I found the Adult Education program and sat on it for a bit. I found myself restless again and I realized this was my time finally fulfill my goal of obtaining my master's degree. So I applied...I got accepted...and life has flown by.

In the 2.5 years it took me to earn this degree, my life has changed so much. MP proposed to me shortly before my first semester started. I purchased my first house, solely in my name (proud of that!) and closed on it the week of my first graduate class. MP and I began to completely remodel this house at the same time. We were also planning our wedding. Shortly after school started, we lost MP's mom. And I was working full time. My priorities changed, my goals changed and as a result, a lot of my relationships changed. There would be days I would wake at 5am to write a paper, work from 9-5, work on the house until 9 and then work on school work until midnight. I didn't get to enjoy Football Sundays as much and I was on edge a lot, spread too thin. But I did it. I got through my first semester. I think there is one project or assignment each semester that I dreaded like the plague. For some reason, my second semester I was tasked with creating a podcast. I had zero interest in taking the time to do that project. I remember doing 80% of my class assignments the last weekend of the semester, about three weeks before I got married. I no longer need to spend my free Saturdays and Sundays doing school work. Blech!

I started my third semester late - having gotten married and going on my honeymoon for the two weeks of the shortened semester. That summer was spent reading a lot at the pool. I remember the weekend that session ended, I fell asleep at 8pm on Saturday and didn't wake up until 12 noon on Sunday. I was beat.

Last fall I found out I was pregnant, right in the heart of my busiest semester ever. I would sit in my class trying not to vomit as 'morning' sickness would kill me each night. Months 4-8 of my pregnancy consisted of me going to a night class twice a week, getting bigger and peeing more each week. I barely fit in the desk by the end of the semester.

I started this last semester when Ireland was about 6 weeks old. I started this semester before I returned to work. The beginning of the semester was the sign that maternity leave would soon come to a close. I had a book that I had to read for an assignment that sat on my ottoman for a month, because every time I looked at it, I thought Ireland was much more fun. It was a struggle to get and stay focused this semester. But, I did it. I made it. Well, almost. In 48 hours, after I read 4 more papers and do a mock defense, I can say I did it.

I would not have done it without MP. Not only has he been one of my biggest cheerleaders, but he has TOLERATED me. That alone deserves an award

My mom has listened to me bitch about school, or something that was affected by school. She too has cheered me on and rooted for me. She also owes me $5 for every A. :)

My big icker (big sister) was another cheerleader. It was her who got me to actually do the podcast projects when I was tempted to take a zero for the project. She's also one of the only people who truly understands what its like to have insomnia and I love that she 'gets' it. Even though it is a shitty thing to 'get'.

I am so excited to wear my hooded graduate regalia in a few weeks. I am so excited that I finally accomplished a goal that kept popping into my life. I look forward to the possibilities this education brings into my life.

To PhD or not...that IS the question! I can say that I won't PhD for a while...but I hope that goal will creep up in my life until I accomplish that, too!

But for now - I'm hoping to sleep. I'm hoping to exercise more. I'm hoping to sit on the couch more. I know I will play with Ireland more and read all those books like 'The Help' that I've put off for 2.5 years.

Hello Free Time!